As you know, from Black Friday through Cyber Monday you can buy the Worst Cards Ever, a once-in-a-lifetime set of 18 incredibly shitty Exiles cards.

But don’t do it. These cards are the fucking worst. I mean, look at this:

Thank fucking God that this is the last day for you people to buy these shitty cards!

The nightmare is almost over! Burn! Burn in the fires of righteous vengeance!

Not you, the cards. Sorry about that. That’s my bad.

Although truthfully, if you’ve already purchased these shitty fucking cards, or are going to purchase them right now, then honestly…

I hope you get this card, I hope you use it, and I hope it kills your fucking character!

Yea, that’s right. I hope it kills your fucking character. I made this JUST for killing your fucking character!

Look at it. It’s a beautiful trap. So alluring… so dangerous… No skill needed! HIT NUMBER 5! It could do 5 damage! It could save your life!

That badass Henchman is up in your grill? You’re just a poor little Doctor with no Finesse? Use the knife! USE IT! You’ve got a 50/50 chance, right? You can re-roll, right? WHAT COULD GO WRONG!!!