Marple Syrup – Slow Train to Nowhere


I had a whole lot of fun writing up the fluffy Scenario intros for our free downloadable mini campaign, Marple Syrup or The Man with One Red Boot, and of course if you’ve been paying attention to my Being the Fucking Governor posts, you’ll know how important it is to write enjoyable Scenario intros.

So let’s take a look at the start of our little campaign of espionage, mistaken identities, and gratuitous Goonies references!

The old train rocked and rattled on its wavering course through the mountains, belching an interminable gout of sooty blackness into the drab grey sky. The world sped past in a monotonous smear, offering no solace to the unfortunate souls trapped within the depths of technological oblivion. The rhythmic chug and clank of the aged engine was soothing at first, but it had grown into a steady, thumping annoyance, pounding relentlessly against-

“What’cha dreamin’ about there, Cherry?” Tabitha Griffiths, ‘Trigger’ to her friends, set down the innards of a pistol and wiped her hands with an oily rag.

Doctor Cherry Dickens perked up immediately at Trigger’s inquiry, and her eyes shone with a conspiratorial glitter. “You see that feller over yonder, two rows back on the left?” Cherry flicked a thin, dexterous finger towards a well-dressed gentleman in a beaver felt hat. “That there is Prince Albert Cunningham, a big shot investor from the Continent. I speculate he’s got some secret business with Governor Cole, elsewise he wouldn’t be travelin’ incognito.”

Charlotte Canton left off picking her nails and stared intensely at ‘Prince Cunningham’. “You recon so?”

“Iffin’a spent more time in town, kid, ya’d know’ta pay n’mind to th’ Doc.” Caroline Canaan turned the black, lifeless glare of her spectacles on Cherry. “Anyone can see she’s lyin’”

Cherry shot the enigmatic gun-hand a mischievous grin. “Well I guess they’re just here for the sights…”

Two rangy men, their features hidden behind sweat-stained bandanas, burst into the car amidst the deafening roar of gunfire. “Any of you fucking pricks move, and I’ll execute every mother fucking last one of you!”

When you have a zany story about espionage and mistaken identities, of course you have to go with Cherry Dickens as a main character! Once I saw what Bill had in mind for Marple Syrup, I immediately knew that we’d frame the whole thing with one of Cherry’s stories. The great thing about Doc Dickens is that you can always be sure she’s lying, but you’re never quite sure exactly what she’s lying about!